When the G20 starts this week in Toronto, some of the most passionate, disruptive and dangerous people in the world will also be gathering in Canada’s biggest city.  No, not Blue Jay or Leafs fans, I’m obviously talking about the protestors, not delusional sports fanatics.

Security has easily become the biggest expense of the international conference. By now you’ve probably seen or heard all about the 8-foot tall fence that surrounds the downtown core. Costing the city millions of dollars, the protestors have proven themselves as dangerous group that often commands such security. While I’ll never stand why our world’s leaders can’t just talk over skype like the rest of us, the city seems prepared for what will be a very tumultuous few days.

So what about the protestors?  I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t mind if we kept them around a little longer.  Sure they can be disruptive, unruly and dangerously aggressive, but since we are Canadians, why not get them to stick around and do some of the stuff we are way to nice to do ourselves?  Afterall, most of the protestors have traveled from all over the world, the least we could do is keep them busy.

So what do you do with a group as energetic and proactive as the G20 protestors?  Here are some ideas:

  • Ottawa is only a train ride away.  Since they are so close, I wouldn’t mind if they protested the impending selection of the new Governor General. (At least until William Shatner is rightfully called to duty.)
  • Being originally from the Maritimes, I always marvel at the fact that so many Canadians do not know about the deliciousness that is the McLobster.  Making sure that every McDonalds serves the Atlantic Canadian delicacy seems like just the thing these protestors can make happen.
  • Mike Bullard.  Where the heck did Mike Bullard go?  The Canadian equivalent of Leno has been in the shadows for way too long.  Lets disperse the protestors and make finding the comedian our top priority.  If this can’t be done, I’d also accept Rita McNeil, The Moffats or the cast of Danger Bay.
  • I really hate doing laundry.  These protestors seem to have a lot of time on their hands.  I am optimistic that we could work out some sort of arrangement.
  • It may be just a few cents, but how annoying is it that we have to pay for the postage on our tax returns? I don’t know if the protestors have a call to arms or a bat signal, but I would like them to be all over this.

Mike Morrison

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