>So the other day I was browsing through trashy magazines while waiting for my flight at the airport and i came across a picture so disturbing it shook me to my core. It made me sit up (although I was already standing.) It made me look around and it me gag. (Just a little.) Ladies and Gentleman may I present to you the picture that changed my life.

Thats’s right that is Val Kilmer! Val “Batman” Kilmer. (Side note: I’ve never in my life written the words Val Kilmer, let alone, twice, while I guess now thrice)

“What the heck happened Val?!?” I asked myself, while holding my big mac, big slurpee, while wiping my face from the remnants of the chili dog. And then I saw it. My future, if a movie star could look like that. What could the star of an early 90’s New Brunswick government commericial turn into?

So this is when the new Michael comes into play. I HAVE to start eating better. I would say excercise, but let’s be honest with eachother, that ain’t happening. So yesterday, I started on my no pop for a week fast. Along with the my most expensive trip to the grocery store ever. $50. Not alot you might say, but considering, all I usually buy is milk (both chocolate and white), cereal and Special K bars, this was huge for me. Everything I bought was considerably more nutricious than I’m used to. Last night I cooked supper in my new apartment and ate on my new patio. And this morning I made a good breakfast, mixed with a better lunch.

I’m really excited about this new change in my life. I hope I can maintain this healthy lifestyle. I think my biggest challenge will be pop. We never really got it alot as kids, so to me I still consider it like a treat. I don’t drink alot of it, I’m not that guy going in for surgury on “Supersize me” who drinks 6 litres a day, usually a top myself off at a can a day. But still that really adds up. I’m still going to have pop in my life. But I’m going to control it!

And Val, next time we meet on a the beaches of sunny california, we will look at eachothers stomachs, and say….”nice stomach.” Well that’s what will say in our heads, we don’t actually have to say it to eachother. Unless you want to Val, cause that’s totally cool. Whatever you want. Either way, I’m cool.


Mike Morrison