>So the much anticipated election piece that Maclean Kay and I wrote together about those running for Alderman of Ward 8 here in Calgary finally showed up on the website today. You can check it out here, or keep reading.
I’m going to post it on my blog as well because I really don’t like the formatting the Calgary Herald did and I want to make it a little easier to read. So I am going to split it up.
Michael Morrison: First things first, I have an announcement about John Mar that may shake Ward 8 to its very core. While some feel it may not be very important at all, I feel that Calgarians have a right to know: Mar has a shocking secret on his iPod. We all have a guilty pleasure buried on our top 25 played list, but Mr. Mar’s lies near the very top. The number 3 song that he listens to over and over is Dido’s White Flag. Again, not important. But definitely something to think about.
Maclean Kay: I agree, shocking. Also of interest was John’s entourage. Yep, he brought a chaperon to our little coffee date. Like a lot of chaperons, Jason was friendly enough, but also made sure we kept our hands to ourselves. The Yawn Move was completely out of the question. I don’t know that John needed a chaperon. He’s a former RCMP beat cop, and told us a story about staring down a mountain lion with a gun. John probably could have killed us both with a pencil. He’s like Chow Yun Fat, but running for office.
Michael Morrison: Am I the only one scared/thrilled by the prospect of an alderman being able to stare down a mountain lion? Just think of how that superpower could clean up the East Village. But that is not Mar’s neighborhood of choice. He (and probably his chaperon) is from Sunalta. In case you didn’t know that, he’ll be happy to remind you. Over and over and over.
Maclean Kay: Mike, be fair, he’s the community association president, he’s bound to be gung ho about his ‘hood. Given the last election turnout of below 18 per cent, having a private little fiefdom like Sunalta might be a viable winning strategy. Of course, Mike probably gave up on John the second he admitted to not having cable. Mike knows the words “I don’t have cable,” but he doesn’t understand them. Hey, he watches Robot Chicken online and has a prodigious DVD collection, is there no common ground?
Michael Morrison: I’ll always find common ground with a hardworking guy like Mar. He seems anxious for the chance to roll up his sleeves and give Ward 8 the voice he thinks we need, but that could have just been the double decaf espresso talking. He also gets some sympathy votes from me because of the surprise he has planned for his kids. I won’t spoil it here because his kids can read but I’ll give you a little clue: _ i_ _ e_l_ n_!!!! So even though he only just now took his daughters to Ratatouille (it came out 3 months ago), he definitely gets the cool dad points.
Maclean Kay: No word on whether he lets his kids near his leather jacket collection or corresponding boot collection, though. Yup, John has an eBay habit. It’s kind of impressive when a man tells you he owns more than 10 leather jackets and an Imelda-like boot collection. (He said Imelda, not me. I didn’t want to end up in a stray mountain lion pen.) Such a man is secure. Of course, staring down mountain lions will make you secure. If nothing else, John would be a well-accessorized alderman. Hey, you don’t get to be the Don of Sunalta without a top-rate wardrobe. That’s just common sense.
Michael Morrison: Yeah what was with the 10 leather coats?! Animal rights aside, was he planning on auditioning for Top Gun 3? Since he was one of the most integral people in making sure the John Howard society didn’t set up shop in Sunalta, maybe if he is elected we can make sure he donates at least eight of those coats to the society. After all, that whole issue was one of the main reasons he is running, so the least he could do is say thanks for the free publicity.