Why I didn’t go see GrindHouse:

It was about 4 months ago that I posted the Grindhouse trailer and was so excited about it. The directors were kick ass, the cast was amazing and the concept brought life to today’s increasingly dull cinematic landscape. I could barely wait for April 6th, so I could be one of the first to see this amazing new take on a classic genre.

Then April 6th came and went and now it is over 2 weeks later and I still haven’t seen Grindhouse. Apparantly if you follow boxoffice statistics, I’m not the only one who made false promises to this movie. As of today, Grindhouse has made just barely over $20 million. This is an embarrassing talley consider who is involved in the project.
Even as I sit here now, I’m trying to think of what went wrong.

For me, the easiest way to explain why I haven’t gone to see Grindhouse is this: It’s way too long. When you combine both movies with the fake trailers, the movie runs just over 3 hours. And I don’t know about you, but who has that kind of time. I usually try to stay far away from movies on the weekends and on weekday nights, I barely get three hours before I have to go to bed to get ready for the next day.

When I heard about this project, I presumed the moves would be much shorter. I thought about an hour each, bringing the whole kit and kabutal to just over 2 hours, a much more reasonable time. But three hours is almost ridiculous. I can’t think of the last movie I saw that was that long. It might have been 2005’s King Kong, but even that was under 3 hours and almost as bloated as the giant monkey himself.

So why haven’t you gone to Grindhouse? Surely Rodriguez and Tarintino can draw in audiences individually, but why not as a tag team? It looks like the movie studio is actually going to re-release the movies later this year as two separate films. I wonder if this will work, or if they should just call it what it is: a big giant bloody flop.

Mike Morrison